Remembering Loved Ones In Your Wedding Ceremony
- Debbie Taylor
- May 12
- 3 min read
Couples often want to remember loved ones who have passed on their wedding day.
Part of my role as their wedding celebrant is to give them ideas and options and understand what will best suit.
There are no right and wrong ways to remember people you loved. There are many ways we can include this in your wedding ceremony and a few factors worth considering.
Ways to remember loved ones on your wedding day.
Mentioning your loved ones within the ceremony is a simple way to acknowledge the person and the relationship you shared. It is easy to include a personal reflection or connection or make a statement about how the person would have felt about the couple.
Recently, a groom wanted to acknowledge his grandmother who he shared a special relationship with. In the ceremony when remembering his grandmother I used the groom’s words, saying that ‘he knew she would be proud of him today and that she would have adored his bride’.
Bouquet or Suit Charms are an easy way to carry a photo of your loved one with you as you walk down the aisle (bouquet charm) or have them close to your heart (suit charm). There are a few companies who will make these to order for you. I’ve used Perfect Charmer and always been thrilled with the charms and their responsiveness.
As your marriage celebrant, depending on what you want, I can mention the charm within your ceremony, or just leave it as something you share with those closest to you. It is worth letting your photographer know so that they can capture your special memento!
Similarly to photo charms, other symbolic charms (eg angel wings or something which represents them) worn on or inside your jacket or pinned to your dress can be a simple acknowledgement of your loved one.
Memorial candles lit during the ceremony highlight your loved one and create a reflective moment. It is easy to get memorial candles designed to align with your wedding colours and theme or simply use a plain candle. The choice is yours.
Memory tables give you the opportunity to remember and acknowledge a group of loved ones. Photos of each person can create a beautiful visual display. Alternatively, symbols (or both photos and symbols) of each person create a focus which often gets your guests talking as they spark memories.
Save a seat. Sometimes words aren’t needed! A simple sign on a seat will send the message you want without any explicit acknowledgement.
Thoughts to Consider For Remembering Loved In Your Wedding Ceremony
Firstly, your emotional response. Again, there are no right and wrong answers here!
No-one doubts the love you shared, but it is worth thinking about the impact hearing your loved one acknowledged in your ceremony is likely to trigger in you. Sometimes, when emotions are very raw, simply mentioning someone’s name can cause a flood of emotions. You may decide it is better not to mention them in your ceremony, which is when a visual acknowledgement can be the best alternative.
Your guests. Yes, it is your day, but we all process grief in our own way and our own time. While your first consideration should be your response, it is also worth considering the likely response of your family and friends who will be at your wedding.
There are other more personalised options.
As your wedding celebrant I’ll work with you, talk through ideas and test thinking.
I provide all my couples with a draft of their wedding well in advance, so that is a good opportunity for you to feel your response when you initially read whatever we agree on in the context of your wedding.
Of course, it is OK for you to change your mind and go with a different option. You will be looking at the draft well in advance of your wedding.
If you are looking for a marriage celebrant who is focused on you, will support you and create your wedding just for you, then let’s chat and start making your wedding dreams come true.
By Debbie Taylor
- Everyone's Favourite Canberra Wedding Celebrant
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